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If married and/or have children how do your families react to the sport ? What does your spouse say about all those night jumps ? etc

I started BASE with a girlfiend..........

We broke up
my mother did not talk to me for 2 or 3 months
my aunty did not talk to me for a year and tried to emotionally blackmail me
my boss threated to sack me
some skydiving friends did not talk to me
I questioned whether it was worth it............

BASE803 (Mr C P) (I think thats his number) said to me on a meeting "dont worry it will all be worth it"..............

He was right......................

My mother is now very cool with it
My aunty has read some i wrote about it and now understands
my boss thinks its now "not that bad"
my skydiving friends are now interested and respectful ( and explained why they did not talk to me)
and I am slowly getting back with my GF who now is proud to say "my boyfriend BASE jumps)........


LIFE IS VERY VERY FUNNY!!!!


its hard but worth every moment of life!!!

Not married, or not precisely. But my boyfriend and I will celebrate 5 years together soon so the difference is somewhat academic.

I introduced him to skydiving. Later he introduced me to BASE. Now we skydive less and BASE jump together.

No kids. Not from lack of trying, mind you.

maybe IVF will help!! hehehehe

trying again after the previus post got hijacked by cyperspace...

i were married, and i have 2 kids,i divorced their mom before i started BASE..

My gf(who has 2 kids aswell from an earlyer realtionship)knew i were a BASEjumper as we started,she has never asked me to stop BASE,not even when she had to call her dad to go and pick me up under my local(which she got alot of troubble from).
All 4 kids think its cool and my youngest daughter (2years)could say BASEjump before she said skydive,they all rather see BASE/skydive than children tv...
my parents dont like it but accsept it,and even ask to see video of it(my dad).
i got my first BASE-related problems as i had my accident,there i found out who were my true freinds and who wasnt...
But i also got new freinds by BASE(true freinds for life)
my boss dont know i BASE,and in the note about my leg.. it just said i felt on a feild

EDIT: im the one that said im married and has kids as you forgot the status,just the kids

No shit! its wierd how some of the best friends you have in this sport dont even live in the same country!


but i guess the long timers have known this for years............ us newbies are just finding this out and realising the best people you meet and love are miles away!!!!

Thank God BASE tandems are a rare sight.....

Thank God for that, stop the madness. You can try all you want, but babies don't come out of butts. Get a clue, go back to nature, man + woman = baby.

chill winston!!!

I think he has the clue, note the "sarcasm" in the post.

HI Rendezvous,

I am glad that you have posted this poll. I have also been interested to see if there are a lot of other people out there who are succeding in their relationship with partner/child while participating in BASE activity. I am recently a new father of a baby girl about 5 months named Kindigo. The jumping has taken a back seat to the baby due to the obligations of being a new parent but I have done a few in that time and my BASE experiences are even more fulfilling then they were before. Perhaps it is a risk/reward issue but my awareness seems to have increased as opposed to being narrowed by the concerns of being a responsible parent. I guess my view point is to remain committed to my child who chose me as a father and the person that I aspire to be. BASE is very much a passionate part of my thoughts and I hold true that I will continue for as long as the fire burns within me. Fortunately, my wife is completely supportive of my passions and realizes that the fire that burns within contains all my passion and when pieces of that fire are removed due to fear then there may as well be no fire at all... that just leads to plain bad sex and that's when the shit really hits the fan!

I don't personally think I could BASE after having a kid. Seems a bit selfish to the child imho...

Just my two cents and I guess, how I'm built.

Oh my goid, is that right? My eyes are opened. I've reformed my ways. I've now chosen your worldview. I'm no longer sexually or romantically attracted to men. Heil JEEEEEEZUS -- I'm saved!

You have taught her well, my friend.

you know.. kids are werry forgiven.. my kids only know me as the person i am.The person i am loves to jump off objetcs,and they love when dad is happy.

BASE IS an ego sport,thats why i do it.I jump becours I like it and no one should ever tell me to stop unless i deside it my self.You know i have this veiv on evrything here in life. i do it as long as i like it,if i dont like it i stop doing it.

Cant you be a good father and a BASE jumper at the same time?that sounds as wrong as saying you cant be freind to a gay.
My kids would never which me to stop enjoying life,they know BASE IS life to me.

When i die(hopefuly in a rollerchair chaising BASE813 on a olderhome(?))i hope my brothers and sisters will tell my kids and family,about the Faber they knew.Colecting video and pics,and hand it to my family,to show them what a great life i had.Take my ashes to my at that time local object(if i should be so unlucky to die before i get too old to jump),and spread it from the top.

Zennie... i dont know what i did to them,i just think they were unlucky to not only get my ugly face,but also my passion to fun stuff.I really are concerned as they stands on my bed,whith a 36`pc as handheld yelling 3 2 1 c ya (going 0.002seconds)before i hear BUMP ouch.. no bones stiching out dad im okay silly kids.. did i ever tell that i love them

I totally agree. I am a single mother with two children and I want to start BASE jumping in the future. However, I don't think that makes me a selfish or a bad mother. I feel that I am teaching my children that just because you have kids that does not mean that you have to give up your dreams. I would never want my children to stop something because of what others will think of them. You do what is in your heart to do. I do have to say that I do always put my children first and always will, but that does not mean I can't start BASE jumping.

I think the greatest gift you can give your children is independence: the conviction to be yourself, to follow your dreams, no matter what anybody else thinks.

I had a girlfriend who after 4 years said her or parachutes.
I still have my parachutes.
My wife has been on a couple tandems, for fun,
but she's no skydiver.
My daughter went on a tandem for her 13th birthday.
She had been after me for years to let her try.
She went for it, with great skill, but that was that.
She does have more typical teenage interests.
All of my family know that what I am is a BASE jumper.
Take that away, and what would I be?
I'll stop jumping when I'm done.
Until then, pack pack pack, jump jump jump.
My wife and child were friends with some of my now
deceased BASE jumping brothers and sisters.
They know it is dangerous, but that I respect the danger,
and jump as safely as is possible.
I have a will, and life insurance.

Hi freakydiver,

I seem to have a lot of friends in the community that share your opinion. It is one that I can respect because the activty is so intensely personalized but I am not sure that I understand the selfish aspect.

I do as I do, not for the things I destroy or create, but for what it is that I am. I think the concept of selfishness falls in the realm of guilt and a few other feelings that group themselves with self exploited righteousness. For me to know any better and acknowledge selfishness I would need to understand the intent of my existence which aside from various relgious followings or new age beliefs is still a bit of a mystery to me.
The one thing that is certain is that we all share the common thread that life is full of experiences and as much fun as the good ones seem, the bad ones are just as important to living a great life. I think the concept of selfishness supports the argument that bad experiences are not only undesirable but should be avoided at all cost including avoiding anything with an element of risk greater than what may be commonly accepted in our daily lives.
There is only one thing that can end a BASE career...ground. It may be the literal ground or the metaphorical grounding of one's personality to reject the risk/reward of the activity. Either way, I respect all those who have explored the deep corners of their minds to know themselves better through BASE.

I proposed to my girlfriend at Bridge Day 02' while she was working in the Vertigo booth. I was wearing my Ill Vision hat as I dropped to one knee and popped the question. She was so happy she bought me a brand new Warlock and Dagger 244 right there on the spot. That's when I new I had picked the right girl. Good question

Awe that is so awesome. Congrats to you and her!

Rendezvous,

Awsome timing for this post. I have 0 BASE jumps to date, but just ordered my first BASE rig and intend to make my first S at Bridge Day, unless my gear gets hear quicker .

I am married to a whuffo, and have 2 wonderful boys. My wife tolerates me skydiving every weekend and spending alot of timw away from home with it. Don't get me wrong, I pay for my actions, but she is there every Sunday night when I get home. When I approached her about making some BASE jumps and seeing if it's "my sport" or not, she witout a doubt went ape shit on me. I think as time goes by, she is adjusting to it, in her own way, but at first she did mention that her and the kids would be gone when I got back from Bridge Day. What's the worst thing a woman can do to man? Give him an ultimatum. I bought my Bridge pass the very next day, and within a week ordered base specific gear.

Will she be there when I get home? God I hope so. But if she isn't, I blame her, not me. I am who I am. I honestly feel like BASE is calling me, not me just looking for new adrenaline. Maybe I'm wrong, and if I am, I'll live with the consequences the rest of my life. My kids are too young to understand fully the passion I have, but they know they want to be just like dad when they grow up.

I love my wife and kids, yet I want to have a life, and live it to the fullest. To some it may be wrong, but to me, it's just plain ol right.

Ganja

The following was shared with me via email, and I felt it had relavence to this thread, it comes from a BASE jumpers wife, to a skydiver wanting to start BASE jumping, and working through the issues with the spouse. I removed the names, but I think all involved would love to share this if they thought it would help ANYONE. I think its a nice look at what types of folks this sport has to offer, and the relationships that support our brothers and sisters.

Anyways hope this helps, and Faber, you ROCK.
Later
Blair



"Perspective Jumper.
XXX wanted me to let you know how I feel about his base jumping. I met XXX when I was 16 and he was 18. He was already skydiving at that time. We got married 3 years later. So his "need for speed" or craving for the adrenlin rush has always been a part of our life. I usually don't worry about him when he is out base jumping. I go on to bed and fall asleep with no problem. Here is why:
1. We are both Christians. I know he's going to heaven if something happens. He is in God's hands. If he wants to jump out of them, that is his decision.
2. XXX is very safety concious. He doesn't try anything too crazy unless it has been tested again and again by someone more crazy.
3. He does not call me in the middle of the night to rescue him from jail or the side of the road. He did once, that was the last time. Lot's of base buddy connections come in handy. Never base alone.
4. XXX is a big jokester, but he knows not to ever have his base buddies play a joke on me about something happening to him. Big mistake!
5. A happy man is much easier to live with - at least he is not out drinking and carousing.
I'm going to love XXX as long as I have him here with me.
I look at it this way, it's easier than living with a policeman, fireman, racecar driver or golfer (he tried golf for awhile, and he was not a nice person to live with).
Our children, boy(15) and girl (12) just think we are normal. They don't seem to worry either.
I hope this is helpfull!
XXX's wife,
Hottie Wife"

cygnusbase,

Your kind of example definitely helps me answer some of the questions that run through my mind about how BASE may be viewed in a relationship when it matures to the point of marriage and kids. It's nice to know that the sport actually extends over a wide spectrum of people and is not stereotypical. Ofcourse, I'm not talking from the point of view of the passion that all BASE jumpers share for the sport. I want to take up BASE jumping, I know I have a passion for it, have had it for a long time but I still want to understand the various angles to it and it's easier to gain a perspective on it by hearing from others who have already been there.

I've been married for 5.5 years and times were rough early on. But if you bring your girlfriend/wife along with you on all your trips, it definately helps. Get them involved, let them meet other girlfriends and wives and make them a part of your jumps. Whether it be working groundcrew, shooting stills, or just hanging out in the LZ watching everyone land. When you go on vacation, make sure you give her a day or two to do the things she enjoys. Juggling BASE and marriage can be tough, but give it some time and find an even balance between the two.

I too am married with children. There was a time when I had a guilt trip about this. You have to do a lot of soul searching to BASE(or skydive for that matter) and have a family.

I've been on the edge waiting for that little demon to tell me it's time to jump, and then a thought of my family would flash in my mind.
What do ya do? I guess you stay true to yourself and do what you and you alone, know that you should do.

I understand how those who don't BASE, and say they wouldn't if they were married with kids, can see us as a bit selfish. We humans have been programmed that way. "When married, life stops. Begin new life. Have kids. Buy SUV. Get beer gut"

My kids know I'm not like most other dads they see when they go over to their friend's house. And I think that's a good thing.
When I'm with my kids, (they live with their mom by the way. Divorce not BASE related) I'm 100% devoted to them. I may drag them out to the DZ If I want to make a skydive once in a while, but hey, it's important that they are involved in things that dad likes to do to. I feel it let's them know that all though I love them, life is not always just about them. It gives them balance.

I've remarried, and actually didn't start BASE until my second wife. She's the one who screwed me up. We live life the same. On the edge, or as close as we can get to it.

One time I was on top of tower and I radioed down to her to start the video camera. This was gonna be my first video. I was stoked. Well, she calls back and says "I can't get it to work" It suddenly dawned on me I forgot to put a fresh battery on before we left home. But I wasn't gonna tell her that. So I throw myself off anyway, gather up my shit, and proceed to the car and gave her the silent treatment like it was her fault my special moment got ruined. I later fessed up. See, BASE jumping husbands are assholes too.

The next weekend we go out again, fresh battery, she nails it this time. Get's a great video even it is only 10 seconds worth. I was happy, and that made her happy.

Some advice to would be BASE husbands, if you tell your wife you're gonna do something like call her when you start climbing, just before you jump, and as soon as you land, DO IT. Little things like that mean a lot to them. And it's the little things that can make ya or break ya.


Rod

NO one shouldnt ever ´try stop me or anything else in my kids name they stands in the mithel and they are the only once that dont even sure understands what happens all time..they are innocent and should be treated like that.

This is all very late, but this is probably the first time in months I've been able to sit down at a computer for any reasonable length of time.

Sandy and I were married at TF last month and want to say THANKYOU! to everyone that either attended or sent us their best wishes.

To those that were there: Tom, Steve, Mark, Miles, Bryan, Luke, Chad, Stephanie, Grace, Craig, DJ, Ray, Slim, Al, Nathan, LJ, Raistlin, Ian, Des, Matt, Ron, Hazel, Dave, Theresa, Bert, Don and a large portion of tourists and residents of TF.....it was wonderful sharing our big day with all of you!

I finally got a K visa to cross the border after 8 months waiting and started work a few weeks ago.

Getting ready to amp up some jumping for the latter part of the year. Drop me a line if you're passing through PDX....first pint's on us.

(I'm pretty sure this post falls within the forum guidelines Tom, please edit if I'm wrong...thanks)

i lost you mails as i got viruses(i simply formated the shit) i owe you a video from the day,whith wishes from DK... write to me soon and ill send it right away

ROFL!!!!!!!!

I just think that the chance of not being around to raise my children isn't worth anything. I realize the reasons people base. I also realize the chances one has of getting themselves in serious injury situations or death. If I'm going to have kids, I plan on being around as long as possible to raise them is all and lets face it, and if you disagree, you certainly don't understand the negative facets of base, but base IS NOT safe nor will it ever be.

I'm not bashing anyone for their decisions, just explaining why I said what I said.

Well put - if I may - kids can show you just as much about yourself as anything else in the world though. IMHO its a helluva lot easier to BASE than it is to KIDS (). But seriously, I guess I could rephrase my original post to say something like, I won't personally BASE if I ever have kids because I would consider it selfish to my own kids. I don't look at anyone else with negative eyes for what they do as the world is a free place and to each his own.

Well put though.

i hope you will its a blast to give life to humans,and seeing them growing up and learning is just great..

so do i... if i think im gonna die or get injuryed at a jump,i wont do it.. that simpel,but i deside by each jump if its worth it(hope i explain good enough)

we all say yes to take a risk,some more some less,thats why you have extreme BASE jumpers regular jumpers and "safty"jumpers.

belive me i understand you,i had to deside which side i would be on..

I agree. I do plan to have kids one day. And I do plan to stop BASE jumping when that happens.

On the other hand, I have done a fair bit of BASE, so I doubt I'll feel like I missed out on the adventure. If the BASE adventure and the kids adventure were starting at the same time, I think it might be a little harder to make that kind of decision.

I know that the worst thing that's happened to me in this sport is losing good friends. I can't imagine what it would be like to lose a parent. I'm just not willing to take the chance of putting my children through that. This is especially true since I've already reaped a large percentage of my personal rewards from BASE. At this point, the risk-reward trade off still lands (narrowly) on the side of jumping. With kids, that will change for me.

Everybody makes their own decisions, based on their own risks and rewards. Make the decision that is right for you, then respect others for making the decision that is right for them.

Correct, Sir. I have one whole jump, a new baby, a burning desire, and a good mentor who also has a new child. Since the kids came, neither of us has made a jump. We have been planning one for a couple of months, and also having many talks about this very issue. I definitely would never forgive myself if I deprived my son of a father (he probably wouldn't forgive me, either). Leaving a child is not worth anything in my opinion. However, the decision is not mine to make. If I truly thought that to BASE jump was to sign my death warrant I wouldn't even consider it. BUT, I would then not be able to consider (cliche alert) driving, flying, or many other activities. While some are necessary to make a living, isn't seeking beauty and meaning also vital to pursuing a life? I too am a Christian, and will take jumping one jump at a time, like Faber said; assessing the risks of each jump. I will show my son that I love him every day and he will know that when I go, by whatever means, I was fighting to live the whole time. I hope I didn't misstate anything, because, while clear to me, these thoughts are not well suited to paper or monitor.

A friend of my wife lost her husband on a racketball court today. Dropped dead of a heart attack. Should everyone with kids stop playing racketball too? You have to live your life to the fullest while you have it in front of you. I was always taught as a child, If it's your time, it's your time. You reckon my mom, who taught me that, will remember it when I tell her I'm gonna start base jumping?

Ganja

it couldnt be said better...

sorry to hear about that guy

word.