How to save $$$ in BASE
I just found a way to save thousands of dollars and dramatically improve my quality of life! For years, stupid me, I have been a responsible jumper, knowing my limits and not pushing in this sport too much.
For years, stupid me again, I would pay $239 (!!!!!) EVERY MONTH for a health insurance that covers BASE jumping (regardless of my many preexisting conditions, medications that I take and seasonal allergies that I have). It could’ve been half of that, if I would’ve gone with a plan that didn’t cover BASE.
For years, stupid me once again, I would pay an annual fee of $112.94 for a SPOT w/insurance (just in case I ever need a heli rescue, since SPOT subscription covers that). What a WASTE of fucking money!!!!
For that amount of saved $$$$, every one of those years I could’ve had a new rig or annual BASE trip and most importantly I wouldn’t have had to pack my rig every fucking single time

All I had to do, was to always jump unpacked, regardless of the technicality of the jump or the winds, and if I would ever get hurt (highly unlikely) I would just put some sad pictures up on the Internet, have a friend set up a donation page for me and have all my friends (and their friends) chip in for my hospital and rescue bills (I would make sure to promote the donation page myself as much as I can). I wouldn’t even feel bad about doing it, since everyone can afford a $5 donation (price of a cup of coffee, for god’s sake). Luckily, I have 1500 ‘friends’!! And after all of that money is collected, I could always just talk to the hospital’s billing department and have my hospital debt significantly reduces (they do that if you don’t have insurance) or set up payment plans (often no-interest for 2 years), charge my credit card (thank god we live in a country where those exist) or if worst came to worst - file for bankruptcy (sucks – but I should’ve planned ahead when I chose BASE jumping/kayaking/climbing/surfing over reading on the couch). On the good note – with all that saved money, here goes another brand-new wingsuit for moi! Ha-ha, suckers!

The only really weak part of my new plan is that if I happen to break my back on a jump and need a wheelchair for the rest of my life or will be on life support for years to come, who is gonna cover those bills? Friends and their friends would doubtfully pay for that long. I guess there are family members… Nah, I’ll stick to my responsible life, full of packing hours *big sigh* and dignity.
So the answer to the question “Should you help a friend in need?” is “Abso-fucking-lutely!”. Maybe just not through Facebook rallies and shameless “Look at this sad picture of me, feel sorry and pay NOW” self-promotion. I can guarantee, if you happen to get hurt and need help with doing your laundry, cooking a meal and paying the bills, your real friends will, without a doubt, shop for you, bring you over a home-cooked meal and figure out a way to stick a check/$5bill in an envelope and put a stamp on it. Personally, I would give 10 times more of a donation to someone who doesn’t skip on packing before a technical jump, doesn’t jump in 15mph winds and has a health insurance, because that would be the case when shit just simply happened. In the other cases – you asked for shit to happen and now don’t want to deal with the aftermath. I guess this logic makes me an ass in the eyes of all those irresponsible people, but that is OK by me. I heard of this girl who broke her back jumping (not just a toe, a wrist or a leg) and was knitting little puppets for sale in the hospital bed to help herself with her medical bills. No donation page setup, no begging – what a way to be a responsible grown up! Makes you want to give her your last penny.
Note to those who want to do some good in this world and help out. How about donating to a family that got hit with cancer out of nowhere; to those ribs-sticking-out starving (literally) kids in many third-world countries that can’t afford even a simple flu shot, let alone pain killers; to an animal shelter that rescued a dog that’s been daily tortured, beaten up and dragged around by the neck tied to a truck by a power-hungry redneck; etc. Because cancer, starvation in certain parts of the world and animal abuse are not a choice. But BASE jumping is.
Stay safe, everyone!

“Sarcasm - it helps to keep me from telling people what I really think of them.” [unknown]
