Basejumper.com - archive

Seems like I have seen one too many posts in the Beginners forum that says something like, "I'm passionate and extremely serious about learning BASE. What's the quickest way?". Of course it turns out that they have no skydiving experience at all but are very skilled at watching youtube videos.

Makes me wonder if there are people that go onto other specialized activity websites and look for the fast path.

Like maybe someone going on a gay website and saying, "Wow, I've been watching a bunch of gay Go Pro videos and that shit rocks!!!! What's the fastest way to become a gay porn star?!!!".

Or going on a senior citizens' website and asking what's the quickest way to reach the age of 65.

Maybe I'd better stay out of the Beginner's forum.


Walt

sometimes, I must stay away myself.

Contact locals in Texas?

Perry makes it look so easy

Dude! First you must masterbate to two hundred gay porn videos. Then if you are ready, you must go take a FJOC, First Jack Off Course, There you will learn the in's and out's of being gay. Things like, how to give really good head, the trick is to really get your head going in a fast circular motion and NOT mess your hair up. But if you do mess your hair up, the really good FJOC's have plenty of hair dressers on sight. Then you will learn how take it up the ole wazzo and really like it. When you take it for the first time you should start out with a smaller penis. Ideally you want an ass loading of 1:1. As you gain more experience you can increase the size of the penis and eventually have an ass loading of 1:10. "DONT RUSH THIS PART" Your Master Baiter will decide when you are ready. When you are done you should be able to fit a Pringles can up you ass.

Next you will move on to how to bleach your anus, shave your balls and not cut your self, giving and recieving manicures and pedicures, the latest fashons. There is even a class on how to talk gay.

Next you will learn things like positions with you hump buddy, two ways and three ways.

My advice is to take it slowly.

People who rush into this usually end up hurt and usually end up dead anyway. Why rush it? You wouldn't want to go onto a BASE jumping forum and ask "What is the quickest way into BASE jumping" would you? So why would you want to rush into this? You should also fill out your profile.

Good luck!

Your post should be a sticky!!!!

Walt

is an FJOC required? or can i get a mentor?

It seems you know too much to not have taken it yourself

Actually, I learned all of this from the "Great Book of Gays".

I took the class with the Tranny option.

...or maybe "Confession of a gaydiot"?!?

Progression. One step at a time. You'll find a mentor after you complete your FJOC.

Yes look for mentor .
I hear NAMBLA will empower with teaching you true Man-Love at a very early prepubescent age of 8 years old .
.

but ive got nice hands and ive always been comfortable around men in the locker room. i think im different than other people starting out!

Is there tandemGAY

That is still a very contraversial subject. Most people don't really know how to decide on that topic. I mean, if you go take a ride with a NASCAR driver in his car, does that make you a NASCAR driver? If you swallow just because you like the taste, does that make you gay? And, if you pay for tandem gay, that just makes you a john.

On the flip side, it does give you an insight of the world of gay humping. I don't know, to each his own I guess. And why in hell am I talking about all this? I love eating pussy.

buUUut youuuu weRe thinnnNkinnnng iiiiit

Put some tits on that thing and I might.

run into a gay bar and yell "FANNY PACK!!" and bend over

I was just born gay... I can't think of many reasons why someone would want to become gay if they weren't born this way.

If anyone needs help in coming out, let me know ;-)

-=Raistlin

Thread drift for sure, but what is your take on the current hard push by the political left in the U.S. to redefine marriage?

Walt

I wish the gay couples in the US the best of luck.

-=Raistlin

oh shit... roflol