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weak.

Come on Calvin, you didn't laugh at all?

what do you tell a woman who has 2 black eyes?

Nothing, because you already told her twice!

Well, TizzyLishNinja, did you laugh?

So you equate a silly joke about a husband not realizing he just hit the jackpot and admits to his wife that he was having sex outside the marriage, by telling a joke that condones "abuse"?

I bet your a hoot with the racial jokes as well, got any of those?

Thanks for explaining your joke.

I used to bartend for years so
yeah I got a bunch of jokes of
all kinds, most are old & bad...
just like yours.

Here a racial joke, somewhat
BASE related, at your request:

A white guy, a black guy, and
a chicano guy are on top of a
building --- all three jump off
at the same time, who lands
last? The chicano cause he
had to stop and spray paint
on his way down.

a priest, a rabi, and a black profesional wrestler enter a bar and the bartender replies "what, is this some sort of joke?"

A rhetorical question is a figure of speech in the form of a question posed for its persuasive effect without the expectation of a reply (ex: "Why me, Lord?")[1] Rhetorical questions encourage the listener to reflect on what the implied answer to the question must be. When a speaker states, "How much longer must our people endure this injustice?" or "How many times do I have to tell you to stop walking into the house with mud on your shoes?"; no formal answer is expected. Rather, it is a device used by the speaker to assert or deny something.

Yeah, I know what rhetorical
means, I saw Mr. Woodcock

and your point being?

I thought it was funny and for the German speaking folks, here is a homepage packed with anti-feminist jokes!!! (which I, completely politically incorrect, find hilarious but that might just be cause I'm not American;)

http://www.frauenfeindlichesarschloch.de/

How about paying some attention to the chess board? You missed a great opportunity last night to get another half-drunken move out of me

Now that's not fair Hausse.

What is funny is how I posted 2 jokes, with different endings. One the wife dies while the husband benefits from a blow job and the other, the husband dies and the wife keeps the money; yet the responses to them were different.

I avoid jokes that use race or sexual preference. I don't introduce my friends by their race, such as "my African American friend" nor would I say "my Gay friend".

People are people. It's not about the color of skin, the company they keep in their bedroom or their ancestry, it's about what's inside their hearts and souls.

I enjoy sharing the differences between the way women and men think, it's universal. The funniest examples are those based in truth.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuMZ73mT5zM

Yeah, yeah, yeah Bro...

I am on campus right now,
my chess game is saved at
home on my MAC, even tried
to download three different
shareware chess programs
but none of them allowed
me to set the game up as
human vs. human.

So I just pulled out the set
I keep in my office for the
occasional student challenge.

Next move coming in minutes...

What does one get when you are wholly drunk?

Umm, rough sex & poor packing?

Ding Ding Ding!

ok ok

enough with the in-fighting

whats important is:

1) is tizzylishninja hot

2) does tizzlishninja base jump

3)if the answers to questions 1 and 2 are yes, can i get yo number??

PS: I'm a good and honorable man, a pioneer really

What if the answer is "yes" to question 1 and "no" to question 2?

Time to post a photo

good enough for me

base jumpings not hard

Not hard?

I think you are over simplifying. I have watched the videos, looks difficult to me.

Not striking an object or going splat on the ground takes a great deal more than luck.

 
the hotter the girl, the easier it is

So what's my chances Calvin, you have seen my photo.

Does that mean you are done?

aww wtf, how come he gets a photo??

A man bursts through the door, loudly exclaiming to his wife of many years..."Hey, I just hit the Lotto for $10 Million dollars...start packing!"

She rushed into the room and said to him..."Holy crap! That's amazing! What should I pack? Should I pack for hot weather or cold weather?"

He replied..."I don't give a fuck, just pack your shit and get out!"

359

Calvin has a photo because he was my first friend on this forum. He is always a polite gentlemen when we chat. He is patient and answers all my BASE questions even when I ask the same ones. He is never condescending based on me being female or a non-jumper. He has taken the time to write his stories and thoughts about BASE to share with me. And finally, he has been very open and kind in making me feel that I am not intruding on the "all boys club".

Probably not the image BASE jumpers think is cool to portray, but none-the-less, it is my perception of Calvin drawn from my interaction with him.

A woman bursts through the door, loudly exclaiming to her husband of many years..."Hey, I just hit the Lotto for $10 Million dollars...start packing!"

He rushed into the room and said to her..."Holy crap! That's amazing! What should I pack? Should I pack for hot weather or cold weather?"

She replied..."I don't give a fuck, just pack your shit and get out!"

"Yep, still funny."

Done? Why would I be done? I was just saying that GM hit it right on the money..

A woman bursts through the door, loudly exclaiming to her husband of many years..."Hey, I just hit the Lotto for $10 Million dollars...start packing!"

He rushed into the room and said to her..."Holy crap! That's amazing! How should I pack? Should I pack slider up or slider down?"

She replied..."I don't give a fuck, just pack your shit and get out!"

Thank you to Stevenm for that one!

Ding, Ding, Ding.

Sounded like the microwave.

Ah, my bad... it was supposed to be like "Ding Ding Ding, we have a winner!"

A microwave just goes "Ding." Or if its a relatively newer model, "Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!"

Absolutely!

359

I just keep thinking that it will be incredibly funny if this young lady turns out to actually be Johan420 in drag.

That would be funny she says pondering whomever Johan420 is, but oh so wrong.

I hate to burst your bubble, but she is not Norwegian.

it doesn't take my ACME Moderator ToolKit to tell she can write far better than he. thankfully, they are not the same person.

I can pretend to be Norwegian...I mean if need be.

Ok, I actually don't know Calvin but he just qualified as a GBA Prospect...

GBA?

and Tizzy, BASE jumpers are men first, then jumpers.

better than paraglider pilots however, who are little girls first, then paraglider pilots, then men.

I think this is what MikkiZH was referring to.....
http://www.gbabasketball.com/Site/

Or maybe he meant the Gameboy Advance? Or the Gay Business Association?

Well now...if that is what he meant, than he is correct on one matter, "He really doesn't know Calvin".

Must be a paraglider. (shrugs)

Almost... more info can be found here:
http://www.dorkzonehero.com/...course-from-gba.html

Mikki,

I watched the video you PM'd me. Very nicely done.

You my friend are not a paraglider.

Perhaps one day you will not only be a member of GBA, but a Hall of Fame member.

Be well.

So what does GBA stand for? The best I can guess is Giant Bad Ass?

  how do you make a seven year old girl cry twice????

tell her you ate her other brownie