Re: [pope] Post pics of your vehicle and your illegal jumping plans!
Let me have a crack at this one....
Here's the whole plan.
I arrive at your Mom's house at 4:20 where I break into your room and smoke your entire stash you keep under you mattress with your Playgirl mags. Once the sun goes down I walk out into the backyard a stare up at the object. Your 250 foot Sasquatch of a mother stands there casting a shodow upon me under the full moon. I gear up next to her stankey ass feet and grab my grappling hook. I hurl the hook as high as i can and after many tries I manage to hook one of her nipple rings. This is the hardest part of the climb since the rope hangs directly down the middle of the object so I can't get any grip off her legs. Using a jumar I climb and climb until I've reached the hole you climbed out of so many years ago. A sudden surge of adrenaline pulses through my body as I find myself staring face to face with a pack of venemous crabs. I now climb faster than I ever have to a cave above the hole and take refuge and a breather. After sucking down some Red Bull, I climb past the sagging overhangs and unhook my grappling device. From here I have great traction from the stretch marks and I make it The base of her neck where I find refuge underneath her adams apple. Here I leave a little donation to the object in the form of a pearl necklace. Ready to finish the climb, I grab a handfull of hair like so many men have done before me and wrestle my way to the top. I gather my thoughts together and prepare for my daring stunt. With camera ready to go since I want everyone to see what a badass I am, I run to the edge of the scalp and with the smalllest amount of imagination I yell "3-2-1 c-ya" as I "flick" myself. I do a triple spinning somersault with a doublebacked gainer and throw out. My canopy cracks open and I flare and land in the street out front where my ground crew is applausing. I then escape in your mom's wooden paneled station wagon and head to your girlfriends house to impregnate her.
If you need a picture of the object, just check the mantle while having Christmas dinner at your mom's house.
You now know the object, vehicle, planned ascent and descent. As far as when, I'm sure your girlfriend's pregnancy test will let you know it has already happened, and I don't need an escape route, I've read on this site that Ninjas don't get caught....