First Jump
Two days ago I did my first jump, from the same legal 110 meter "A" that katzurki blazed on Oct. 30. The jump was PCA'd by an instructor. I'd climbed the object on Oct. 30 to video katzurki's first jump, and went back on Nov. 1 for my turn. Instruction started on the ground, covering all aspects of what to expect, how to handle the exit, what mental state to try and get into, and what to do if the shit hits the fan. Training and discussion continued all the way to the top of the object. The climb, including a 5-10 minute chat at each platform on the way to the exit, took about an hour. Finally our instructor, katzurki, a photographer, and I were in place at the exit, 110 meters from where we started.
We went through gear checks and a last few minutes of mental preparation, and moved up to the edge...
Standing 110 meters above the cold hard earth, with a 20 km/hour cold wind blowing by, ears and fingers slowly freezing, somehow the realization of what I was about to do didn't seem to set in. Two days prior, with absolutely no intention of jumping, I'd climbed that damned object wearing all-too-inappropriate clothing in -2 (celsius) weather. Somehow, on that first climb, I couldn't in any way manage to get my nerves under control, and spent the entire climb up (and down!!!
) shaking and fidgeting. And I didn't even plan on jumping that day. November 1st, everything was under control however. Standing at the edge, looking out over the forests, factories, and various landing areas below, I was damned ready to jump off that object. If for no reason but that I didn't want to climb back down - the climb down is scary!!!
At the edge, 60 seconds from a major fork in my life, a decision point I'd spent three years preparing for, I was surprisingly calm. Of course slightly nervous, naturally "a little on edge", there wasn't an ounce of fear in my mind.
This time, I'd spent the entire climb controlling the precursors to fear that creep up from the depths of your subconscious in the days, hours, minutes, and seconds before something like BASE. At the exit I was ready, and I knew it.
Our instructor did last-minute checks on the equipment as I went through a last-minute mental practice of my jump - imagining keeping my eyes on the horizon, not overrotating, trusting that box-man position, and no matter what goes through my mind in that second to canopy inflation - NOT LOOKING DOWN.
And then it was time. With a "I'm ready" notice from the instructor, I moved out onto the exit point, a small slab of plywood appended to the top of a metal support. I checked the positioning of my feet, trying not to let my eyes spend too much time focusing on the ground so very very close below me. Checked my body position and one last time reenacted the jump in my mind. Realizing I didn't want to be totally calm on my first jump, that I wanted at least some small sensation of fear, I took a long 3-second gaze at the trees and barb-wire below me, letting the gravity of what I was about to do set in, and then fixed my eyes on the horizon.
"I'm ready," I told the instructor. "Am I okay to go?"
With his "whenever you want" reply, I started an internal count, double-checking my mental state, my degree of fear and nervousness (I wanted to be slightly nervous - I am getting into BASE partly because it scares me), but not so nervous that it would affect my jump.
With all lights green, I started my count.
"Ready!"
"Set!"
"Go!"
And a lunge out into nothingness.
I only remember bits and pieces of the next second, but I distinctly recall the feeling that that one second was not a second, but an entire minute, an hour, a day passing by as I felt lack of a firm substance below my feet, and the pitching of my body as I started to roll forward.
Eyes still fixed dead on the horizon, legs straight out behind me (or so I thought), it finally dawned on me that I'd actually done it. My first BASE jump. And a dull curiosity crept into my brain as I wondered how it was going to end. Line over? Off heading? Entanglement? Brake fire? No out? But of course I knew everything was going to be fine.
As the seconds drew into minutes and the minutes into hours, I began to wonder "when is that damned canopy going to open". I felt myself rotate from a head-high position to an angled orientation to the point where my body was perfectly level, flat, falling ever faster toward the ground.
And then, with my eyes still fixed on the horizon, I felt a terrifying sensation! I was starting to overrotate. I was going past a flat, belly down orientation. And just as I was starting to worry about this - BAM! I felt the pull of risers and sensed the familiar sound of a canopy inflating overhead. And 100% on heading too!!! Although for some reason my body spun 50 degrees to the left on opening. Perhaps a low shoulder?
Relief start to set in as well as a sense of accomplishment and I let out the loudest "YEAH!!!" I could possibly scream, then went for toggles. Landing was odd - I'd forgotten how little flare big, slow canopies have (geez I love my 150 Scorpion). Downwinded the landing onto a nice snow/ice covered road and ran it out.
It's been two days and all I've thought about in the time since is that jump. I've watched the video 50 times over, critiqued and relived the jump 500 times in my dreams and mental digressions.
Things that I'm glad I did and that went well:
1) I'm glad I didn't jump on Oct. 30, but rather jumped on Nov. 1st. My mental state on the 30th would not have been appropriate, nor safe, for any BASE jump.
2) I'm glad that I dressed appropriately for the +3 winter temperatures and strong wind. Half of my nerves on the first climb two days prior were caused simply by half-freezing to death on that damned tower.
Things I did wrong:
1) I should have eaten a good meal before the jump. Having skipped breakfast, by the time I was at the top of the antenna, I was burned out, and I know more than anything else, how well I've eaten plays a huge role in how mentally ready I am for something like BASE.
The experience of a first jump was incredible, and I have no regrets about doing it. To be honest, nothing but pride. It's something I did for me. I still have a lot of thinking to do. I'm not sure if BASE is for me. I may quit at ten jumps. There's a HUGE chance I'll stop before 20. But in the meantime, it's something I'm set on experiencing.
I leave for jump number two in 15 minutes.
The above is mostly for myself, to let out 1% of what's been going through my mind in the past 48 hours. But hopefully someone else will find it (interesting, intriguing, reminiscent, valuable) as well.
And I also wanted to say "hi".
P.S. The video is now on skydivingmovies.com. In the BASE section with the name "will-base-number-1.avi"
